I’ll Kill You…I’ll Bury You…I’ll Spit on Your Grave Too! - 2007
Director: Thomas R. Koba

TRUE DUDES REVIEW:
A group of college students venture out to the country to check out the location of a of a future research center/ farm, which also happens to be the location of a grisly murder 25 years earlier. The college kids get to farm and learn all about the bullshit legend that comes with it. It seems the property was once owned by Elmo McFloyd. Elmo died while his son Roger was off fighting in Vietnam. When Roger got back he was pissed to find out that the property was sold to the college by his uncle, and Roger disappeared after that.
One night the uncle and his mistress were chopped up with a chainsaw, then shortly after that some college kids were killed. (I just wanna make clear that all of this is summed up pretty quick in a short monologue by the shitty actor that kind of looks like the dad from Family Ties. And that they never really come back to put any emphasis on any of these plot points through out the movie.) The next day two of the college girls are confronted by the pissed-off sheriff who explains his extreme hatred for college kids. Shortly after that the college kids start getting whacked by a guy wearing army fatigues (hint, hint) and one of those shitty bag-masks.
Earlier in the film, one of the college girls randomly fucked a gas station attendant. The gas station attendant became smitten with the little college slut and decide to go looking after her. He has a run in with the sheriff who informs him that the college farm is private property belonging to some guy called Preston. Gas boy goes to Preston to find out what’s going on. Preston is a wheelchair-bound alcoholic with a picture of himself in Vietnam garb. Preston gives him a map of the farm and sends him on his way.
He finds two of the college students still alive at the farm. As they try to escape they run into the sheriff who places them under arrest and throws them into the back of an ice cream truck which is doubling as a paddy wagon. The masked killer knocks out the sheriff and subdues the others. When they come to, they see that the killer is in fact Preston. The sheriff comes in and cracks the case, discovering that Preston is Roger Mc Floyd. The sheriff is killed giving the group a chance to get away. They get the killer on to a wood chipper and run him through, it turning his flesh and bones into human mulch.
First off this has nothing to do at all with the 1977 sleaze-fest, I Spit on your Grave. This is total Z-grade schlock at it’s finest. Often, I feel a small amount of guilt giving some low budget films negative reviews when they appear to have the potential to be good movies but just didn’t have the budget. That’s however not the case with this cinematic shit storm. It’s actually kind of scary, based solely on the fact that the film makers apparently don’t realize how completely fucking sleazy a film there making. You kind of get the feeling watching this that the film makers got bored of making amateur porn films one day and decided to try their hand at making a horror movie. This movie is like having someone rip out both of your eyes then having them shit in one socket and piss in the other. I need a drink.
Disc is from Eden Entertainment (Robo Vampire, Cannibal Hookers). The disc offers no special features. In fact, it doesn’t even have a fucking menu. Oh, and you can’t flip from scene to scene. My guess is the class acts over at Eden Entertainment intentionally did this to give it that cool, retro VHS feel.

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True Dudes gives I’ll Kill You…I’ll Bury You…I’ll Spit on Your Grave Too! 0 out of 5 middle finger.